Vagin-O-MITE!™ ([info]nedrazeall) wrote,
@ 2007-08-21 12:01:00
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Entry tags:future news history

Future News History - August 21, 2024

Sit Not Stand Law - August  21, 2024

In 2010 a woman named Henrietta Hudson  started a crusade against the men who left urine droplets along side and in front of the toilet bowl.  She began protests to get men to sit, not stand, while urinating.  She stated that every man she encountered would always say they never sprayed the bowl, but she found that when the men in her life used her toilet the bathmat was always damp.  Joined at first with 22 women Henrietta, in her home state of New Jersey, protested at bars and restaurants holding signs that read, “Sit!  Don’t Stand”, “Keep Your Pee Off My Seat”,  “Don’t Fret To Stop The Wet” and “I Sit, Why Can’t You?”

Henrietta’s pleads at first fell on deaf ears until a local councilman, battling the same plight at home, joined her struggle to maintain dryness.  Councilman Janson Lander stood behind her cause and brought wider attention to the issues plaguing many homes and establishment toilets across the states.  But it wasn’t until January 1, 2018 when the whole country was aware of this issue.  While having a New Year’s Eve party, at 3am, Janson Lander, now Senator Lander, was killed when he slipped on the wet floor in front of his toilet, hitting his head against the tile floor rendering him unconscious.  He died after laying face down in a puddle of urine that had collected from all the guests in his home that night, whom had “unknowingly” sprayed the floor while urinating.  It was headline news that the Senator had died drowning in urine at the foot of his own toilet.  His domestic partner, Tristen Oliver, then horrified and wracked with guilt, saying he was also to blame for the Senator’s death, took his own life in a local bar’s restroom.

Following Senator Lander’s death many other prominent figures and celebrities began speaking out against the practice of standing while urinating.  On May 25, 2020 a march went haywire when a large group of  protesters broke out of the march, running into restaurants and bars, smashing urinals in men’s restrooms.  Shortly after many establishments began having their urinals damaged by random protesters of the cause.  Establishments began to voluntarily removing urinals from their restrooms and in mid 2022 many installed sensors on the seats that would monitor if a user of a stall did not sit when using the toilet.

The ban on urinals spread across the United States and was directly dealt with in the President’s 2023 State of  the Union Address.   An elated Henrietta Hudson was photographed dancing around her South Jersey home’s bathroom when she heard that the Sit Not Stand Law was passed.




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[info]cybersweetie
2007-08-21 04:11 pm UTC (link)
hahahahaha...this is hilarious! :)

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[info]nedrazeall
2007-08-21 06:24 pm UTC (link)
This are the things I think about when I step in my bathroom onto the bathmat. It's a shame I have to wait until 2024.

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[info]cybersweetie
2007-08-21 06:26 pm UTC (link)
I made a post this morning about my boyfriends' obsession with the toilet seat being up versus mine being down..then about 2 minutes later read this! I'm thinking about sending him a copy in an email! ;)

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[info]nedrazeall
2007-08-21 07:39 pm UTC (link)
Hahaha, talk about great timing. Totally send it!

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[info]cybersweetie
2007-08-21 07:43 pm UTC (link)
Oh, it was perfect timing...and I am going to send it to him; he'll think it's hilarious! :)

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[info]shhbabe
2007-08-21 04:24 pm UTC (link)
Councilman Janson Lander stood behind her cause... Hee!

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[info]nedrazeall
2007-08-21 06:25 pm UTC (link)
You always have your mind... else where!

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[info]lordlucan
2007-08-21 07:09 pm UTC (link)
Thass funny! :))

For the record, it's not unknown for me to kneel before the lavatory, for this very reason, y'know, just in case.

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[info]nedrazeall
2007-08-21 07:59 pm UTC (link)
Kneeling? Were you hugging the bowl?

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[info]lordlucan
2007-08-29 05:06 am UTC (link)
No, no, just very very paranoid about...uh...aiming issues...

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[info]swayworn
2007-08-22 05:59 pm UTC (link)
But wait -- urinals (unlike toilets) are well-designed to be peed on. Why would they get smashed?

See also: http://www.asecular.com/~scott/misc/toilet.htm
(read the bottom half.)

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[info]swayworn
2007-08-22 06:02 pm UTC (link)
Better link:
http://www.expatica.com/actual/article.asp?subchannel_id=53&story_id=34604

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[info]nedrazeall
2007-08-22 07:07 pm UTC (link)
It is to promote the sit not stand law. Duh. Practice is what is needed and if they stand at urinals they were want to stand at the toilet too.

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[info]swayworn
2007-08-22 07:46 pm UTC (link)
NOT FAIR

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[info]nedrazeall
2007-08-22 08:10 pm UTC (link)
Oh it's just one more step, stop being lazy or be jailed... in 2024.

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